After your world has been rocked and you find yourself searching for clarity, purpose and joy again, how do you get it?
During such times, finding a path forward can seem almost impossible. When you’re ready (and not before), one suggestion to navigating this difficult period is to create your own bucket list. (This isn’t for everyone, so don’t feel weird if it doesn’t resonate with you.) This might seem like a curious suggestion, but a bucket list can be a powerful tool for healing and rediscovering joy in life. Here are some benefits of creating and living out your bucket list items:
A Source of Purpose:
Grief can often leave us feeling aimless and disconnected from life. A bucket list helps to reintroduce a sense of purpose by giving you specific goals to work towards. Whether it’s traveling to a new country, learning a new skill, or simply reading a set number of books, these goals can provide structure and motivation, helping you to move forward one step at a time. Be mindful that seeking and finding your purpose again shouldn’t be rushed and should be done in your time and no one else’s. Sitting with our grief is called mourning, and it’s a necessity. It’s painful and heartbreaking, and it’s because we have so much love in our heart for our person.
Honoring Your Loved One’s Memory:
Including activities that your loved one enjoyed or always wanted to do can be a beautiful way to honor their memory. It’s a way of keeping their spirit alive and creating new, cherished memories connected to them. For instance, if they always wanted to visit a particular place, making that trip can feel like a shared experience, a tribute to their dreams and aspirations.
Rediscovering Joy:
Grief can overshadow every aspect of life, making it hard to find joy in the things you once loved. A bucket list encourages you to actively seek out happiness and fulfillment. By engaging in activities that excite and inspire you, it’s possible to rediscover joy and bring a sense of positivity back into your life, even amidst the sadness.
Personal Growth and Healing:
Pursuing new experiences and challenges can lead to significant personal growth. It can help you develop resilience and adaptability, both of which are crucial in coping with loss. Each item you check off your list is a step towards healing, as it signifies progress and the willingness to embrace life despite the pain.
Creating New Connections:
Loss can sometimes lead to isolation. Engaging in bucket list activities, especially those that involve social interaction, can help you form new connections. Whether it’s joining a class, participating in community events, or simply meeting new people during your travels, these interactions can provide support and companionship, easing the loneliness that often accompanies grief.
Mindfulness and Presence:
Many bucket list activities require you to be present in the moment, fostering mindfulness. This focus on the present can be a respite from the constant cycle of sorrow and memories. Engaging fully in an activity helps to temporarily lift the weight of grief, allowing for moments of peace and clarity.
Building a Legacy:
By creating and pursuing a bucket list, you are also building your own legacy. It’s a testament to your strength and determination to live a full life, despite the loss. This legacy can be an inspiration to others who are going through similar experiences, showing them that it’s possible to find hope and happiness again.
NOTE: Your list doesn’t have to be anything that requires money or travel. Start small, set easily attainable goals for yourself. Some examples: appreciate family, live life in the moment, start a journal, celebrate life, give time.
Making your list can help put life in perspective as you continue to heal. Making a list doesn’t mean it is cast in stone. When you have completed a point or have different thoughts about it, cross it off your list and add others. You may respond to your list with a, “Thank goodness I’m alive!”
Creating a bucket list after the loss of a loved one is not about ignoring your grief but about finding a way to navigate through it. It’s a journey of healing, honoring memories, and embracing life. By setting goals and seeking out new experiences, you can gradually rebuild a life that acknowledges the past while still looking forward to the future. In doing so, you celebrate not just the memory of your loved one, but also the resilience and beauty of life itself.